The Autistic Experience

I carry the scars you gave and am wounded inside my soul. The pain others never see, the disdain you have me had for the world. In solace I find comfort and in being alone I feel less alone. You stole my power and took away my light. My glands and left my body in collapse. My hormones in dysfunction and my heart empty.

I have never pulled away from love as far as I did, you broke me and I no longer can let you have the power. I shall no longer hide behind the curtains because I fear claiming myself victim makes you strong. You were my oppressor and you damaged something sincere. Not one word of kindness came from within you and you were rotten with a murky core. My heart seizes to trust but not because humanity is to blame. I allowed you inside me, and you penetrated my soul deeper than my body. I am angry that you abused every inch that you went and took my innocence from within.

You created emptiness where there was once love and I have never bruised so badly that in all the years I hoped a may, but since you I am in awe of the pain and filled with shame. The guilt of letting myself down and letting you hold the leash. You bound me like a rabid dog and claimed to the world you were a hero who had tamed the insane. I was naked for you to display and you wore a smile in your suit of decay, deceit and blame.