The Autistic Experience

Be gentle be kind, hold me with love and pay mind to how much I need you.

Like a bird locked in a cage. I knew only the joy of my master’s love. He fed me at his convenience, and I danced at his whim. I had dreams of a paradise, if only I would do what my master had told. One day I would fly open and free. I had torn off my wings to appease a master who cared only for my possession. Was I nothing more than a prize? A broken bird still has a soul. I may not fly anymore but I will limp and dance till the last hope leaves me.

Dancing in this wicked game I have been traded between masters who have sheltered me from love and given away when my use was no more. I have been an amusement for a time and as they chased others that flew by, I was left in darkness realizing I sold my self for a life of pain. Such is the burden of love and the curse of being different. I escaped my captor and limped from station at a time and found myself surrounded by hounds of doom. I was played with, tossed around and spun for their game. I leapt and through their abuse I gave my heart to every captor that would spare me from their misery only to cast me away after their ego was satisfied.

You had me and showed me dreams, you lead me on and told me lies. I have been broken and scarred but I am no fool to carry on. I know that even in pain and misery I can fly. I may no longer have my wings, but I have this broken heart that is filled with love. If not in misery, then in love, I will be my guide and never stop till I rise.